O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

O Christmas Tree

You decorate a tree
You throw it in the yard
— John Prine, “All the Best

The tree is down and outside. There are still plenty of needles to deal with, but the majority of the annual christmas tree life-cycle is over. As I was hauling it out of the house, a familiar christmas meme kept running through my head.

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
How lovely are your branches!
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
How lovely are your branches!
In beauty green will always grow
Through summer sun and winter snow.
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
How lovely are your branches!

But, as memes are wont to do, it began to mutate:

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Ubiquitous are your needles!
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Ubiquitous are your needles!
In oriental rugs, on hardwood bare,
Like a barber’s floor after cutting hair.
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
Ubiquitous are your needles!

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
The city no longer takes you!
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
The city no longer takes you!
So in my yard for months you’ll sit,
And we’ll compost you, bit by bit.
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
The city no longer takes you!

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Why must we always have one?
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Why must we always have one?
My family likes it, and that’s enough
For me to overlook this other stuff.
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
And so, next year we’ll have one.

Happy new year.

1 comment for “O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

  1. Brent
    January 17, 2015 at 8:35 am

    We’ve had the same plastic tree since 1998 or so. Every year we set it up as a family and take it down as a family, just like I did with my dad when I was a kid. I know the aesthetic pleasure of a real tree is hard to give up, but the aesthetic pleasure of not having a dead tree in the yard is also pretty good.

    BTW let me know if you want to borrow my electric chain saw this weekend.

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